Terms of Engagement – NIJUMIT

⚖️ Terms of Engagement

Last Updated: [Insert Date]

1. Introduction

Welcome to NIJUMIT — the home of parody, absurdity, and artfully unhinged storytelling. These Terms of Engagement govern your relationship with our website. By accessing or using nijumit.com, you agree to these terms in full. If you do not agree, please exit gently and clear your cookies with a ceremonial chant.

2. Intellectual Property

All original content on this site — including but not limited to parodies, stories, logos, visuals, site design, and skeletal whispers — belongs to NIJUMIT. Unauthorized reproduction, distribution, or mutation of any material without explicit permission is forbidden. We own our madness. Don’t steal it.

3. Acceptable Use

You agree to engage with NIJUMIT respectfully, lawfully, and without attempting to:

  • Scrape or steal our content
  • Launch attacks (digital or psychic)
  • Post offensive, discriminatory, or absurdly off-topic content in any future interactive areas
  • Summon cursed entities through our comment forms (when/if they exist)

4. External Links & Affiliates

NIJUMIT may link to third-party websites and affiliate partners. These links are provided for convenience or cash, or both. We are not responsible for the content, privacy practices, or blackhole portals on any external sites.

5. Disclaimer of Liability

This site is satire, parody, and often intentionally ridiculous. It may contain adult themes, controversial opinions, and skeleton-based sarcasm. We are not responsible for emotional damage, loss of composure, or injuries sustained from laughing while drinking. Proceed at your own risk (and preferably with popcorn).

6. Limitation of Liability

Under no circumstances shall NIJUMIT or its creators be liable for any direct, indirect, incidental, or supernatural damages arising from the use or inability to use this site. This includes, but is not limited to, keyboard smashing, spilled drinks, confused neighbors, or existential awakenings.

7. Content Submission (Future Feature)

If and when user-submitted parody becomes available, you retain rights to your submissions — but grant us a royalty-free, irrevocable license to publish, modify, roast, display, and monetize them within the NIJUMIT realm (and any associated .RIP dimensions).

8. Changes to These Terms

We may update these Terms at any time. When we do, we won’t send a raven or ring your doorbell — but the date above will change, and you agree to check it occasionally if you’re the cautious type.

9. Contact

Questions? Concerns? Praise? Reach out via our Contact page. We may or may not answer in riddle form.

10. Final Note

By continuing to breathe in our digital domain, you acknowledge that parody is protected, sarcasm is sacred, and NIJUMIT is eternal.

TIS.
TIS.
TIS. 💀

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